Let’s be honest. Most guys who say they “live a gray man lifestyle” look just like the guy in the photo. Heck, that’s honestly how I dress daily, but I’m not trying to be a Gray Man. They’re wearing a ball cap (to hide my hair color,bro), wrap around operator shades by Wiley X or Oakley, full beard, some type of t-shirt with a gun comapny or veteran logo on it (usually one size too small), some type of cargo pants, and the coolest cool-guy boots (Merrell, Solomon, whatever). Even if they’re not dressed like that, they still walk over to their pickup truck or large SUV and get in, and it has stickers (slaps) on it from all kinds of gun or knife culture. Invariably.
I’m not anti-gray man. I believe in it whole-heartedly, when it is done PROPERLY and in the proper context. In fact, it’s been a basic tool of my career in protection work and investigations. Gray man is nothing more than CAMOUFLAGE, taken to a different level.
For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power…
2 Timothy 1:7a
First, let’s break this myth of the “Gray Man Lifestyle”. That’s not a thing and it’s silly to pretend that it is. You can mitigate the pattern-of-life information that you emit, but you cannot live truly gray. You lay your head somewhere at night, and it’s usually the same place every single night, thereby causing a pattern of life. You have to take your issued surveillance device everywhere you go, because how else can you post the IG selfies of how much of a gray man you are, right? All joking aside, Western society is addicted to their phones and we’ve allowed them to force us to need them for even the most mundane of tasks (checking in at a restaurant for example). It’s unrealistic at best to think you are in any way lowering your target profile if you carry a phone. You drive a vehicle that is usually registered to you or someone you know. It’s usually the same vehicle every day. You work somewhere, you pay bills, you have a bank account.
The idea of the “Gray Man” is a tactic to be used to accomplish a specific mission, and no more. It’s used to blend in to a local area and has to change if you change areas. For example, while jeans and a hoodie are “gray man” in most of western society, if you try wearing them to blend in near a business area, you’re going to stand out. In the same way, if I was wearing business casual and then I dropped into an all-Muslim neighborhood, I would stand out and need to change (I knew I kept that man-dress for a reason).
Once we realize this, we can then adopt all our thinking this way. If I am going to do something operational in a resistance capacity like gather intelligence or set up an ambush, I need to visit the area first and determine the baseline of what everyone looks like there. In investigations, this short surveillance of an area is called a preliminary site assessment, the military might call it close target recon. Then, I can more effectively plan. One note on this: Don’t take your phone, even to take photos or in airplane mode. Buy a digital camera, they are dirt cheap.
I had a friend once show me the “Gray Man” set up he & his guys were going to use once we got into a without rule of law society. They plan on wearing jeans and flannel, carrying standard backpacking packs, and regular hiking boots. As he said “then we’d just look like hikers”. After first asking him if he thought there’d be a lot of recreational hiking in the Boogaloo, I asked him if they intended to carry rifles. They are. Chest rigs? Yep. Sidearms? Yes. So, the plan is to walk around with a backpack on, wearing a chest rig, war belt, and carrying a rifle? Yes. Then you’re not being the gray man, you’re actually sacrificing more effective tools for the sake of a false sense of security.
So what are we to do? Well, it would be better in a full collapsed society (short or long term) to be INVISIBLE. What do I mean by that? Well, learn fieldcraft. Learn to camouflage yourself and your gear. Learn how to move undetected in the woods or operate exclusively at night. Have the tools to do that.
It’s better to not be seen than to not be seen as a threat. If I’m being the gray man, with only a concealed sidearm (because anything more isn’t really gray man), & a group of bad guys sees me as no threat, they’re going to decide to try and victimize me or my group. What if, instead, if they do ever see our 4 man patrol, they see 4 people in full war kit, moving as a trained element, obvioulsy ready for a fight? Do you think they’re going to target us? No, they’re looking for an easy hit, not combat.
That’s one of the biggest misconceptions in preparedness. Everyone thinks that criminals will somehow become braver. They be BOLDER and more willing to commit a crime, knowing no police are around, but their goal remains the same – to get away with your stuff unscathed. If a target looks too tough, they’ll pick someone else.
To validate this, the above photo is from the current trouble in Haiti. He’s carrying the stick like that because if the gangs see that he appears to be armed, they’ll attack someone else. He just wants to get home. Look like a wolf or you’ll get eaten by the sheep.
As Alejandro said to Kate in Sicario: This a land of wolves now, and you….you are not a wolf.
Understand what Gray Man is and when to use it, but also be prepared to be the Invisible Man or at least to give off the impression of a group no one wants to fight.
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Tactical Wisdom 
Western Rifle Shooters Association
https://westernrifleshooters.blogspot.com/2007/05/next-steps-grey-man.html
Do not give in to Evil, but proceed ever more boldly against it
THURSDAY, MAY 17, 2007
Next Steps: The Grey Man
The latest from Habcan:
The Grey Man is always invisible in plain sight.
The Grey Man is totally aware of his environs, his own capabilities or lack thereof, his weaponry and his levels of competence with that weaponry. He constantly strives to improve upon both his capabilities and competence. In public, he is always respectful, even to the point of obsequiousness if the situation calls for it. He always appears to be just a little confused by what is happening around him, while in reality he is alertly doing a tactical assessment.
The Grey Man NEVER draws attention to himself by word, dress, action, or mannerism. The Young Grey Man is dismissed as a wimp, the Older as a doddering old fool. The Grey Man derives great inner satisfaction from having this portrayal of himself accepted by all he meets, for it means he is succeeding in his disguise of his actual persona.
The Grey Man is a private man. He practices with his weaponry in private, or only with his fellow Grey Men, always in a secluded location. If he must resort to use of a public facility, he schedules his practice for times when he is likely to be the only one there. At such times he would probably wear bright clothing, to be remembered only as ‘that guy in the red jacket and sunglasses’, a quite different person from his usual persona. If right-handed, he would always occupy the leftmost station on a NRA bullseye pistol range, with his back to an observer, or the rightmost one for riflery or combat pistol practice. He would not have his name emblazoned on clothing or equipment, nor would he have any noteworthy affiliation proclaimed on his cap. “He’s just a guy. Comes every Wednesday morning for his coffeebreak. Always pays cash.”
The Grey Man does not drive a pink Cadillac with steer horns on the hood, NOR does he drive the biggest mutherin’ 4X4-with-all-the-bells-and-whistles BOV in the lot. The older his vehicle is, the rustier, the less likely it is to draw attention (or to be stolen, for that matter). This vehicle is, under its exterior, scrupulously maintained and in excellent running order. If pulled over by authority on the basis of appearance, it can be shown to meet or exceed all requirements under licensing laws, and an obsequious co-operative manner precludes a search under the seats. The Grey Man does not speed on the highway: cruise control is his friend. So is the Highway Patrol: he waves to any he sees. If he travels the same route constantly, at the same times, The Grey Man becomes a ‘fixture’ and can be dismissed from conscious observation.
It helps the Survivor to build up this persona of The Grey Man gradually and over time. The anti-gun sheeple neighbors will quickly rat out the ‘Patriot’ who is always loudly declaiming about his ‘Rights’ and ‘what will happen if they try to take my guns’. The Grey Man goes far out of his way never to offend anyone, imitating the duck which appears calm on the surface of his pond whilst paddling like hell under the surface.
Be seen as conservative in all you do. A Survivor is a Grey Man, and that little old grey man alone over there in the corner is probably a Survivor!
And that young guy next to him? Just another wimp? Or are they both watching each other’s backs?
Making the other guy waste precious time in assessing the situation is a big part of staying alive. Practice being grey now, while there’s time to build your skills.
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Check out Dan Infalt. He’s a big name in the whitetail deer hunting realm. All he does is focus on bedding areas for big mature bucks. Big mature deer become notoriously hard to hunt, because they know they are being targeted, but they have to lay down someplace. Just sayin’ there’s some similarities to pay attention to.
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